Greetings, fans! A quick note: It seems my readership has been diminishing as of late — so for ratings purposes this week I have decided to slap my editor!
[Editor’s note: “Ow! Hey!]
That’ll learn him to replace my semicolon.
For some time now, I’ve noticed that when I watch a movie, especially during the trailer reels, one of the more ubiquitous sound effects I hear is a certain downward-spiraling super-low note.
So, as any concerned citizen would do, I looked up this phenomenon. Seems I wasn’t hallucinating after all. This extremely low note sound is a thing! And it’s showing up with startling regularity.
This sound effect has been around over five years now and generally comes standard in current motion pictures. Especially in action flicks.
In case you’re wondering, it sounds like “Bwoooooom!”
Yeah, that’s pretty much the technical term for it, give or take an “ooo.”
All hail that rumbling bass-drop noise. Now that I’ve clued you in you’ll hear it all the time. All... the... freakin’... time.
Ever been at the cinema at the start of the movie and they play that THX sound system commercial at volume levels that would crack statues? Well, the “bwoooooom” is designed to reduce said statue to atoms.
To me a “bwoooooom” sounds like the theater speaker system just relieved itself.
Satisfying for IT maybe, not as much for ME!
A ‘bwoooooom’ sort of reminds me of controlled thunder, or Darth Vader clearing his throat. It’s über-low, probably just a few hertz shy of that magic bowel-loosening frequency produced by the infrasound weapons French police use for crowd control.
And I’m cool with that. It’s a phase. Gimmicks come and go.
When I was a youngster the big cinematic shtick was something called “Sensurround.” It was the “bwoooooom” of its time as extended-range bass was developed for theaters to give disaster movies like “Earthquake” a much-needed sense of realism. If that wasn’t subtle enough they’d just turn up the dang volume past the pain threshold while you held on to your Goobers for dear life.
Of course, this novelty required special expensive speakers that were only available for rent from, you guessed it, the Sensurround Corporation.
But why are we limiting the “bwoooooom” to just our cinematic entertainment experience? Verily, it has a practicality that knows no limits.
Marching bands could modify their tubas to create this effect at football games. Especially when their team enters the field. Man, would it strike fear in the opposition as that sinister “bwoooooom” resonates off the stands and into the hearts of the visiting athletes.
I figure one day we’ll even be hearing that sound during robocalls. “Did you know your car’s warranty — ‘bwoooooom’ — has expired?”
That would get MY attention.
“Is that another one of those car warranty robocalls? Why don’t you just hang up?”
“But... but I just got ‘bwoooooomed!’ ”
I’m anxiously waiting for the first political candidate to use it during a campaign commercial. “Hi! This is Joe Politician and — ‘bwoooooom’ — I’m running for U.S. Senate.”
Soon, campaign success will no longer be a matter of political affiliation. It will be a matter of whose sound effects are the coolest.
You might even begin hearing this sound at the polls. Subtly manipulating you with its familiarity as its sonic mechanisms guarantee Joe Politician a stunning victory. Dang! Why am I not a campaign manager?
I’d love to be a fly on the wall for a motion picture editing session. Imagine the movie’s sound editor consulting the producer. “Well? How you like the trailer so far?”
“Hmmm. Needs more bwoooooom!”
Glad this is a fairly modern phenomenon. Most classic celluloid titles would not have benefitted from “bwoooooom.”
“Casablanca” didn’t need it. “Wizard of Oz” didn’t need it.
“Ernest Goes to Camp” — eh, that probably WOULD have benefitted from a little “bwoooooom.” KnowhutImean?
Todd’s weekly column: Coming to you (insert massive “bwoooooom” here!) every Friday.