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In political seasons, satire helps breaks my fatigue with political campaigning:
While crossing a street in Washington, a U.S. senator is flattened by an 18-wheeler. He dies and is standing in front of Saint Peter.
Saint Peter looks through his book and says, “This is most unusual. You must spend 24 hours in heaven, followed by 24 hours in hell, and then chose where you will spend eternity.”
The senator shouts, “I’ll take heaven!”
“No,” says Saint Peter. “Here, the book is the law.” Suddenly, the senator finds himself in heaven with loving people surrounding him. He receives a banquet, a mansion, special gifts and happily joins in the praising.
Twenty-four hours fly by and with no warning, he finds himself falling down, down, down — landing in the middle of a beautiful golf course.
Five of his past political cronies roll-up in golf carts and welcome him to hell. They give him a cold beer, a set of expensive custom golf clubs, play 18 holes and finish the day off with a banquet full of good times and gluttonous behavior.
After 24 hours, the Senator finds himself again standing in front of Saint Peter.
“Senator, you have been given something no other person has ever received — a choice. Which will it be, heaven or hell?”
The senator says, almost apologetically: “Well, I cannot give up the lifestyle and friends to which I am most accustomed. I’ll take hell.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes,” answers the senator.
Down, down, down the senator goes — landing in a stinking, blistering hot dessert. There he sees the friends he left but minutes ago, dressed in rags and wailing in pain.
The senator stammers to his friends, “I don’t understand. Where is the golf course, the beer and all of that food you showed me but minutes ago?”
One of his old chums whispers, “Senator, you have got to understand, minutes ago we were campaigning.”